Rocks With Zipper Teeth: Better Than Garden Gnomes

The once popular garden gnome is at risk of dying out as people ditch the tacky ornament for more sophisticated garden decorations. The whole point of gardening is to create something that is pleasing to the eye and the soul. Garden gnomes clearly can not provide that. That’s where rocks with zipper teeth come in. These garden decors are handmade, each one is unique, and they are definitely an improvement over dumb gnome with an idiotic smile.

Rocks with zipper teeth.

Another great thing about rocks with zipper teeth: these abominations will have your plants soil themselves in fear (so no watering anymore) and your neighbor’s ordinary garden gnomes running for cover (so no more looking at them). Everyone in your local community will definitely love them and the real estate value in your neighborhood will soar!

Rocks with zipper teeth.

These rocks are made of concrete, acrylic paint, varnish, metal zipper, and hot glue. Approximate size no smaller than 4 x 4.5 inches (10 x 12 cm).

So much better than a garden gnome!

Rock with zipper teeth.

If you’re ready to take your garden to the next level, you can get zipper teeth rocks on Etsy for $60 a piece.

6 thoughts on “Rocks With Zipper Teeth: Better Than Garden Gnomes”

  1. “Before going on to fame in the 80’s as “The California Raisins,” the early days of their career saw these unlikely lads woodshedding in Covent Garden as part of the burgeoning London punk scene of the late 70’s.” – NME

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